Fault and Blog Anniversary

En français sous « Lire la suite » 🙂

 

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« Happy Anniversary! »

Wait …. what?? It’s already been a year ? Looks like it has.

But has it really been a year when one has spent almost half that time literally disconnected from the RArmy? I like to think quality over quantity, and I hope that you, dear readers who have followed me during this year, have  enjoyed my dashed contributions.

You may have notice a small change on the blog too …. yes, the header! Bye bye Lucas and hello Richard !

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Which  brings me to the topic I’d like to discuss in this post. Or more precisely the picture I so wanted to write about.

This photoshoot published in « Fault » magazine  is already old news for everyone. But for me, trying to catch up with everything and everyone, I have a fantastic amount of information to dissect. And in this case, enjoy. I think I first saw this picture on Me+Richard Armitage. And I’m looking at it while writing these words, which doesn’t really help me to keep my train of thoughts :-).

I absolutely love this photoshoot. This is probably my favorite of all post Hobbit ones. And yet I do not like the pictures – except one. Why? Simply because of the pictures post-processing. This is an aesthetic choice, yes, but it doesn’t correspond at all to what I, as a person, appreciate. Too much editing and too many effects have been applied on these pictures, which mostly ruined them and prevents me from enjoying them. A pity.

A perfect exemple of my issues with Fault's photoshoot

A perfect example of my issues with Fault’s photoshoot

This one for example. There are all the elements needed to make it one of my favorites : profile porn, nose, jaw line, neck, the delicacy of his ear, his hand, his pensive air accentuated by a slight shrug of brow wrinkling his forehead and, of course, sexy stubbles. I could love this image, I should love it. But I don’t. Why ? Because of massive edits distorting it. What a shame.

Ultimately, what I love about this photoshoot aren’t the pictures but rather the short video showing the making of it. I love the photographer’s bias. I like that it’s a fashion shooting, thoughtful and prepared, even if it’s rather casual. I love the relevant choices made ​​ by the stylist, these outfits reflecting a casual but chic style in which I imagine Richard perfectly. It’s fashion, it’s sharp and simple, with quality materials and good cuts.

When I look at this video, I see the man that I admire. I see his strength, concentration, professionalism, and of course beauty. I don’t see Richard, but Richard Armitage, public persona, and for once it doesn’t bother me. It doesn’t matter if he’s playing a role or if he’s not necessarily comfortable with posing, if it’s not « him. » Because watching the actor being a fashion animal isn’t only easy on the eye ;-).

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I can’t forget how I felt the first time I saw this picture. Like a punch in the stomach, cutting my breath. The strength and power that emanate from him is incredible. It gives me a sense of stability, he reassures me even if he gaves me the impression to judge me. I see him as the man who, seeing me stumble would not help me to get up because it’s for me to learn on my own, but that would always be there to support me, a pillar in his way. Tough love, I’d say, one that can make you grow up. If my situation was different, would I have reacted in the same way ? I don’ know. But what I see, what I feel is the sensation of being pushed forward. Richard is a countless number of things for his fans : he stimulates our creativity, he’s a distraction and an escape, he helps some of us to get up in the morning, he makes us want to go further and to surpass ourselves. And more than anything, he makes us dream.

Thank you Richard Armitage for making me dream (for a year and more ^^)

Lire la suite

« I believe I’ve seen hell, and it’s white, it’s snow white. »

 A new computer came into my life. And it’s far from being the only change I’ve been experiencing. During the last 5 months, I broke up with the man who shared my life for 3 years and I moved into an apartment much smaller, in which I’m trying to learn to live alone after having lived with someone for so long. I lost not only my companion but mostly a very good friend.

I also reconnected with the first man to whom I had the innocence of saying « I love you », almost 10 years from now. I do not believe in the concept of soul mate. I do not believe that there is on this small stone that is our planet a single person for me. I do not think a relationship can last a lifetime. I’m not romantic. I’m way too pragmatic and practical to let me go to this kind of thinking. And yet here I am, caught in the strangest relationship I’ve ever experienced with this man I’ve met when I was barely 15.  

With all these « distractions », it suddenly seems more consistent than I miss the excitement of the last few months and that Richard went into the background.  
But here I am, sitting at my desk in front of my screen at this late hour, writing. I needed to write. To talk about it, about Mister A. His voice, how I feel when I see him, when I hear him. I’m always struck by his ability to leave me speechless. To turn my head upside down, to hit me in my stomach, in my heart, whenever I hear the sound of his voice. It’s not about his pretty face and his yummy peaches. At least not « only » for that. But why this sudden urge? This craving? By transferring my documents on my new computer, I rediscovered audio files (audiobooks, Cbeebies stories and excerpts from interviews) from my « Armitage » file. And what a slap. Again and again. This physical reaction so visceral, goosebumps on my arms, node belly, excitement, as if it was the first time. Only one other person makes me feel that way, and I realize now how much these two people are alike. Without even thinking, I grabbed the DVD of North and South and launched the first episode. I wanted more, I needed the comfort that could bring me Richard Armitage as my personal fantasy.  

The integrity of this blog has been compromised, just like my tumblr’s since a person close to me has had access to these platforms. It’s also one of the reasons for my silence. I’ve always spoken freely here and expressed my ideas without filters. I find it difficult, however, to act as if nothing had happened. But I don’t want to be ashamed of what I am, of what I like, of what I think. I’m not ashamed to be part of this army, in my way. So I’ll try.  

I still need some softwares to recover before I show you some beautiful creations of my own and my late reactions on photoshoots who made me swoon 🙂 I have a voice and I’m gonna use it.  

Good night Armitage Army.

Un nouvel ordinateur est entré dans ma vie. Et il est loin d’être le seul changement que ma vie ait connu. Au cours de ces 5 derniers mois, j’ai rompu avec l’homme qui partageait ma vie depuis 3 ans et j’ai déménagé dans un appartement beaucoup plus petit dans lequel j’essaye d’apprendre à vivre seule après avoir vécu en couple si longtemps. J’ai perdu mon conjoint mais j’ai surtout perdu un très bon ami.  

J’ai également renoué contact avec le premier homme à qui j’ai eu l’innocence de dire « je t’aime », ce il y a près de 10 ans maintenant. Je ne crois pas au concept d’âme soeur. Je ne crois pas qu’il y ait sur ce petit caillou qui nous sert de planète une seule et unique personne faite pour moi. Je ne crois pas qu’une relation amoureuse puisse durer une vie entière. Je ne suis pas fleur bleue. Je ne suis pas romantique. Je suis trop pragmatique pour me laisser aller à ce genre d’idée. Et pourtant me voilà embarquée dans la relation la plus étrange que j’ai connu avec cet homme que je fréquente en pointillé depuis 10 ans.  

Avec toutes ces « distractions », il semble soudain plus cohérent que je rate l’excitation de ces derniers mois, que Richard passe en arrière-plan.  

Mais me voici, assise à mon bureau, devant mon écran à cette heure tardive, à écrire.J’avais besoin d’écrire. De parler de lui, de Mister A. De sa voix, de ce que je ressens quand je le vois, quand je l’entend. Je suis toujours frappée par sa capacité à me laisser bouche bée. A me retourner la tête, le coeur, le ventre, dès que j’entend le son de sa voix. Ce n’est pas son physique. Du moins pas « que » son physique. Pourquoi cette envie soudaine ? Ce besoin impérieux ? En transferrant mes documents sur ce nouvel ordinateur, j’ai redécouvert les fichiers audios ( audiobooks, Cbeebies stories et extraits d’interviews) de mon dossier « Armitage ». Et quelle claque. Encore et toujours. Cette réaction physique si viscérale, la chair de poule, le noeud au ventre, l’excitation, comme au début. Une seule autre personne me fait ressentir cela, et je me rend compte à présent à quel point ces deux personnes se ressemblent. Sans même réfléchir, j’ai saisi le coffret DVD de Nord et Sud et lancé le premier épisode. J’en voulais plus, j’avais besoin du réconfort que pouvait m’apporter Richard Armitage en tant que fantaisie personnelle.  

L’intégrité de ce blog a été compromise, tout comme celle de mon tumblr, une personne de mon entourage ayant eu accès à ces plateformes. C’est aussi une des raisons de mon silence. J’ai toujours parlé librement ici, exprimé mes idées sans filtres. Il m’est cependant difficile de faire comme si de rien n’était. Pourtant je ne veux pas avoir honte de ce que je suis, de ce que j’aime, de ce que je pense. Je n’ai pas honte de faire partie de cette armée, à ma façon. Alors je vais essayer.  

J’ai encore besoin de récupérer certains logiciels et de retrouver mes marques avant de vous présenter quelques jolies créations de mon cru ainsi que mes réactions tardives sur des séances photos qui m’ont faite baver par exemple 🙂 J’ai une voix et je compte bien m’en servir.  

Bonne nuit Armitage Army.